Authority issues means projecting onto authority figures in a way that distorts the relationship—treating them as someone to rebel against, to please, or to seek validation from, rather than as a fellow human. Both rebellion and approval-seeking are forms of handing your power over.
Joe couldn’t conceive of having a mentor until his 30s. He would look at spiritual teachers’ book covers and dismiss them (“this guy needs his photo on it—he’s all ego”). He couldn’t trust any teacher because he projected his unreliable father onto every authority figure.
“Authority issues basically means that you are treating authorities not like human beings… you either think that the authority is trying to oppress you or the authority is somebody that you’re trying to please.”
Both sides lose: the rebel doesn’t get mentorship, wisdom, or support. The people-pleaser doesn’t get to think for themselves or follow their own wants. Either way, you’re not paying attention to your own choices.
Related Concepts
- What triggers you in others is something you don’t like in yourself
- External patterns mirror internal ones
- Rebelling against authority and seeking its approval are two sides of the same coin