The somatic difference between vulnerability and just being scared is the direction of your relationship to fear. When you’re being vulnerable, you’re embracing fear — opening to it, feeling it in your body, jumping off the cliff. When you’re just scared, you’re trying to get rid of fear — saying whatever will get you out of the situation.
Embracing fear is deeply empowering. It says: “I can feel this. I don’t have to cower to this emotional experience. I’m powerful enough to embrace this emotion that most people want to reject.” When fear is fully embraced, it often shifts to excitement.
This distinction also explains why vulnerability is imprinted as dangerous. As children, we weren’t accepted for who we were — don’t cry, don’t get angry, man up. This programming (laid down during the theta brainwave state from ages 0-7) tells us: if you’re yourself, you’ll feel helpless, scared, and wrong. But Joe notes you only need to move through that programming two or three times before the system changes itself. It’s muscle memory, and it can be rewritten surprisingly quickly.
Related Concepts
- Vulnerability is speaking your truth even when it’s scary
- Fear as road map, not enemy
- Facing fear builds empowerment
- Fear is present on every path so face it directly